“We remember the time around scars.”
Michael Ondaatje
I guess this is quite true in a literal sense. There are very few scars on my body that I can't tell you where or when they happened; like when somebody hit me with a shoe - except it was one of my running spikes and they left a nice big hole and a pink scar to this day. The scar on my lip where I had a lump removed; the scar on my foot where I jumped in the air to catch a ball and landed on a broken bottle - sharp side up. I can literally recall nearly all of my scars and the moments that surround them. Now I stop and think about it there are lots of stories and some really weird ones!
Thinking about it non-literally, and thinking about those scars that we carry one way or another, that might be negative stories we tell ourselves about our looks our worth our value or whatever, I think we can remember the time around them as well.
Its funny isn't it how we have an inbuilt mechanism - the physical scar - by which to remember damage. But no real inbuilt-mechanism by which to remember joy, fun or beauty; or achievement, success or growth. Hmmmm.
Perhaps that's why it is so important to stop and reflect and remember the good things, the achievements, the successes. Perhaps that's why I try to record the very best moment of my day; or spend time at the beginning of each year reflecting on what we achieved the year before; or identifying my ten favourite pieces each year.
I just started a piece of paper, jotting down all the good things that happened in January and pinned it up on our study wall - in case I forget them. We can get a little boost each time we read it and go yeah - that was great! It seems to me that those things don't always come with a built-in reminder or looping tape.
And what might this photo have to do with the whole story? Well...last week in Sydney I was fiddling with my pens, this one popped out of my holder, jabbed me on the top of my foot and bounced off into the floor. And landed like this. I thought it was way cool, took lots of photos and forgot for ages that I was bleeding from its piercing. A tiny pin point of a scar now adds itself to my body with a story.
Michael Ondaatje
I guess this is quite true in a literal sense. There are very few scars on my body that I can't tell you where or when they happened; like when somebody hit me with a shoe - except it was one of my running spikes and they left a nice big hole and a pink scar to this day. The scar on my lip where I had a lump removed; the scar on my foot where I jumped in the air to catch a ball and landed on a broken bottle - sharp side up. I can literally recall nearly all of my scars and the moments that surround them. Now I stop and think about it there are lots of stories and some really weird ones!
Thinking about it non-literally, and thinking about those scars that we carry one way or another, that might be negative stories we tell ourselves about our looks our worth our value or whatever, I think we can remember the time around them as well.
Its funny isn't it how we have an inbuilt mechanism - the physical scar - by which to remember damage. But no real inbuilt-mechanism by which to remember joy, fun or beauty; or achievement, success or growth. Hmmmm.
Perhaps that's why it is so important to stop and reflect and remember the good things, the achievements, the successes. Perhaps that's why I try to record the very best moment of my day; or spend time at the beginning of each year reflecting on what we achieved the year before; or identifying my ten favourite pieces each year.
I just started a piece of paper, jotting down all the good things that happened in January and pinned it up on our study wall - in case I forget them. We can get a little boost each time we read it and go yeah - that was great! It seems to me that those things don't always come with a built-in reminder or looping tape.
And what might this photo have to do with the whole story? Well...last week in Sydney I was fiddling with my pens, this one popped out of my holder, jabbed me on the top of my foot and bounced off into the floor. And landed like this. I thought it was way cool, took lots of photos and forgot for ages that I was bleeding from its piercing. A tiny pin point of a scar now adds itself to my body with a story.
I loved this post! Hope all your scars heal well...
ReplyDeletexox
Thanks Anna - it's an interesting thought is't it? Hope your foot is healing well and without scars...
Deletegood story Fiona and poignant photo!
ReplyDeleteI once asked the Czech glass artist Dana Zamecnikova where she found her inspiration, she replied - "Where else can we put all the fears, joys, sadness, frustrations & wonders but in the art?"
Thanks Mo - I loved the story and the shot! What a poignant way of expressing yourself and/or viewing the word by Dana, thanks for sharing it. Go well
Deletecool fiona. totally cool. i'm reading ondaatje right now AND am bleeding from a tin can top (special wendy food) that sliced my right thumb. and a blizzard, they say, is on the way. but life is very very good.
ReplyDeleteVery timely then Velma - and yes, way cool that photo! Hope your hand heals and you enjoy Ondaatje - I often think he writes so beautifully I can barely understand him. Sigh.
DeleteTHis is so true Fiona, and my own tendency to recall the "bad" things so much more than the good frustrates me constantly, even as I work to minimize it. I guess it's a survival mechanism left over from our days living "wild" and I also guess it's why the camera was invented - to help us recall all those happy times and good things that slip away in the recesses of our mind.
ReplyDeleteHi Amanda - yes, I find it a bit frustrating too how the bad is so much easier to recall! As you say maybe that's why we invent systems to record, keep track of happiness and good events. Photos and notes are good triggers and reminders I think. Here's to remembering happy things!
DeleteTrace Willans said...
ReplyDeleteI have to leave blog comments this way once more.
I have started a large jar this year, in to which I am placing things to remember for the year.
I shall open it on new years eve and have a good read.
I like the idea of a jar or a box filled with good time reminders - what a great thing to do on NYE - looking at something and it being a trigger to recall - oh yes, that's right, that was so great etc etc. I look forward to hearing how it goes. Happy collecting!
DeleteI cut my finger on some glass last week and I'm constantly knocking it and putting the healing process back by a few hours every time. My skin is a road map of my clumsiness with things over the years but it seems I never learn. Perhaps the memories of scars are clearer because they come with the sharp reminder of physical pain. Wonderful, happy moments are quite ethereal and transient. Perhaps that's why they slip away so easily? Who knows Fiona? It's beyond my understanding.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad it is also beyond your ken Lesley. It really made me think tho - how the negative carries a physical reminder and as you say the happy is so ethereal. I guess I'll be pondering that for a lifetime yet...
DeleteI think I'll take up your idea of writing a list of good things weekly or even monthly. I bet a year from now I'll be astounded at their number!
ReplyDeleteI think so too Ersi- I just looked at January and had already almost forgotten half of them! I think we can all do with a little positive feedback every now and again...
DeleteI had a visceral reaction to your story about landing on a broken bottle. Ouch! I have many carving scars from my early days (pre-teens and teens). Not only have they served as warnings but they also remind me of happy memories. Discovering what I could do with chisels and wood was a great joy to me. These scars remind me of how I became an artist. As usual your Thursday Thoughts have given me much to ponder.
ReplyDeleteOh yeah Robyn, I was 11 and the scar is still with me - and I haven't been able to bend my big toe ever since! i like that you have positive scars as well - I imagine caesarians scars are a bit similar. Ilike how they also taught you how to do things properly. Most of mine are the result of random acts of failing to pay attention or bits of surgery!
Deleteam laughing at your expense - was a funny photograph story!
ReplyDeleteNow that I have stopped laughing I can comment more maturely! (just love the image of you photographing the pen in the floor while your foot lay bleeding!) I think one of my favourite authors is Ondaatje so any of his quotes strikes a chord. You are so right in saying we can recount each of our scars and speak of the battles that caused them with flourish and fabrication sometimes to enhance the story. I am covered in such stories. Funnily enough I just put the copy of The Being There Diary You gave me onto my travel pile, thinking I will start to recall my favourite moment of the day while we are away. It is good to make not of those moments.
ReplyDeleteI understand the laughing Susan - i did it myself when I realised I should probably pay attention to my foot and not share the blood around... It's an interesting thought to ponder isn't it - and that wee book could be a great way to capture and remember the magic of your trip.
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